"It’s a classic story of a vague evil will be unleashed if the villain gets the Mcguffin into the thingamabob before...

"It’s a classic story of a vague evil will be unleashed if the villain gets the Mcguffin into the thingamabob before the running people can shout us to death. Oh no! Not “pure evil!” Everyone hates that! Everything is entirely vague and there are no rules and so it’s just Tom Cruise running around punching out reanimated corpses (do the dead people double die when touched by Tom Cruise’s tiny fists?) and swimming through tombs that fill with water for some reason, failing the “Where are they and what are they doing” test for almost its entire running time. It’d honestly be much more watchable if they left out all the VFX and we could just watch Tom Cruise dodge imaginary demons in front of a green screen, since the only thing truly compelling about all this orgiastic tedium is the lengths to which Tom Cruise will go to commit to a lost cause."

Strålende anmeldelse af endnu en film, jeg ikke skal se.

"Steven, hvordan sørger du så for mestendels at se gode film?" spørger I så interesseret.

"Jo," svarer jeg. "Jeg fører en liste over film, jeg måske skal se via mit hjemmeprogrammerede hjemmebiosoftware.

Film kan kun komme på listen hvis

1. troværdige anmeldere roser dem og jeg skal også helst have udspurgt en person, der har set filmen, før den kommer på.

2. et familiemedlem eller en ven propper den på

Film fra kategori 1 er som regel gode (tænk Force Majeure, Tillsammans, Dredd). Film fra kategori 2 glæder som regel folk og/eller stimulerer en samtale. Og så er det ikke helt spildt.

http://uproxx.com/filmdrunk/the-mummy-2017-review/2/

?The Mummy? Is An Incomprehensible Mix Of Stuff

?The Mummy? is an incomprehensible montage of stuff corporate America thinks viewers love.